Sending an anonymous bouquet of flowers or an anonymous gift hamper can feel romantic, playful, or deeply thoughtful, but this sentiment isn’t always shared by the recipient. At best, the flowers are well-received and the recipient feels intrigued or flattered, though they likely still have plenty of questions about the identity and intentions of the sender.
Most people who request anonymous delivery do so with the best of intentions. However, with an astounding figure of approximately 55% of women and 13% of men in New Zealand experiencing intimate partner violence in their lifetime—physical, sexual, economic, and psychological abuse (including stalking), and controlling behaviours—there are many scenarios that make it far more likely that an anonymous delivery will leave the recipient feeling anxious, threatened, and unsafe.
Recipients who are not in a steady relationship are likely to question who sent the gift, how the sender got the address of their home or workplace, and what the intention might be. For those who are in a steady relationship, an anonymous flower delivery from someone outside of the relationship may trigger jealousy which puts the recipient’s physical and emotional well-being at risk.
At Fleurish, we take all steps to minimize the odds of enabling this kind of behaviour. We choose to prioritise the privacy and safety of our customers and recipients, and doing this requires us to disclose the name of the sender for all orders. In addition, if we are contacted by law enforcement about complaints of harassment, stalking, or abuse, we will fully cooperate with these enquiries.
All customers are required to acknowledge our Terms and Conditions at check out which outlines that sender names will be disclosed, but we still occasionally receive requests for anonymous delivery. In these cases, we contact the sender to explain our policy. If this is not acceptable to them, we refund the cost of the order. We do not make exceptions.
Those who have experienced or are experiencing intimate partner violence deserve support. If you are in New Zealand and you need help, the following resources are available:
Women's Refuge - 0800 733 843 - website & online chat
Shine - 0508 744 633 - website - online chat
Are You Okay? - 0800 456 450 - website & online chat
Shakti New Zealand - 0800 742 584 - website (culturally appropriate support services for women, families, and children of Asian, African, and Middle Eastern origin)
Hohou te Rongo Kahukura (Outing Violence) - website (specialised support services for Takatāpui and Rainbow communities)
